Picking it up

Although I was still cramping pretty bad, I went back to school today. I was so scared that I would have to re-live the miscarriage and even more worried about everyone knowing we are trying to have a baby. I still worry that the question will begin soon. "When are y'all going to try again?" I don't mind the question so much, it's just that I can't think about trying again. I need time to grieve the loss. I understand that it happened for a reason, but I keep going back to the fact that I'm not pregnant anymore. Moving Addie to a big girl room doesn't seem so easy anymore. That's what I get for planning...

There are many reasons why I love teaching but I was reminded today when I went back. Instead of a barrage of questions, I got loving hugs from my co-workers and a normal day from my students. You could say my classroom is my La-La Land. It's a special place where the outside world doesn't seep in. There is no tv, my phone stays on silent, I get occasional emails, and very little time to myself. Sometimes I think being cut off from the world is a bad thing, but today was different. All I wanted was normalcy.

Planning for a sub is always a nightmare. I knew that I was going to be out Monday for my doctor's appointment so I had sticky notes on books, I typed up the day's schedule, every book needed was laid out, morning work was on the board, homework was ready, copies were made. Tuesday, though, was a total surprise. My poor sub just had to wing it. I didn't mind getting my room back together today and re-teaching everything. It kept me occupied. Now if I can just muster through the aching and constant yearning for sleep, I will make it.

Here is our little blessing...think we should cut out some tv? ha...